In this critical period, if parents don't force their children, it will ruin his life! Regret watching late
Parents' educational methods directly determine their children's future achievements.
Many parents ask me how to teach their children.
I'm sorry, this question is too general to give the best answer.
But there is one thing that every parent should pay attention to. In the critical period of children's growth, you should be accompanied by appropriate education methods, in order to get twice the result with half the effort.
Otherwise, they may miss their future.
With the introduction of my colleagues, I met a couple. They were a typical example of "looking forward to their son and becoming a dragon". Unfortunately, they gave birth to a "bear child". They still don't know how to discipline them.
I asked them to talk about their children's situation at ordinary times, and found that they encountered the problem that most parents would encounter - child rebellion.
Their son, long long long, is a sophomore in junior high school this year. His grades are average. He doesn't like to study. He is addicted to playing games every day.
In his mother's words, "the mobile phone does not leave the body, the eyes do not leave the screen, you have to play whenever you have time.".
Every time his parents stopped him, long long would lose his temper and even quarrel with them. Now he has broken several vases in his family.
Father felt that the child was still young, there was no need to be too tight, plus always be angry, so began to put on a "do not want to tube" attitude.
The mother was distressed for her son. She thought that the learning task assigned by the school was too heavy, so she acquiesced in her son not to do some homework. She came to help him do it.
Hearing this, I already understand what their problem is. At the critical time of children's growth, parents actually choose a laissez faire attitude, which is definitely not a good thing.
Many children in junior high school stage will rebel, especially in the second year of junior high school, there is no sense of maladjustment in junior high school, and there is no sense of urgency facing the entrance examination. In addition, all aspects begin to mature, so they are eager to make their own voice.
In other words, if you want to prove that you grow up, you dare to resist parents and teachers.
For children in junior high school who start to rebel, parents must guide them correctly to avoid children's deviation.
This is what I suggest to the mother
Have an in-depth conversation with the child as soon as possible, but never criticize the child.
Use the tone of a friend to understand the child's real ideas, to show that they can understand and accept.
Briefly talk about your recent experience and feelings, strive to get the understanding of children.
The above three points apply to most rebellious parents.
In fact, children's rebellious is only a stage of the characteristics, not personality, not to determine the development of children's life.
What parents need to do is to understand, guide and support. Only under the equal relationship, can the communication be carried out smoothly.
Only when you reach a united front with your children will they support your next move.
That is, to help children get back on track.
Obviously, this mother is used to spoiling her children, but she seldom plans for her children's future.
After communicating with long long long according to my suggestion, she found that the stubborn child was crying. Only then did she know what he was thinking.
It turns out that long long long also wants to get good grades in the exam, hoping to be praised by his parents and teachers.
But he really can't calm down to study, the results have not been raised, coupled with the father often scolded, so some of them give up.
Therefore, longlong's mother specially communicated with the head teacher to explain the real situation of longlong. She hoped that the head teacher and teachers of various subjects could help him improve his grades.
At least, don't think of him as a "bad boy".
What I want to say is that many children show obvious rebelliousness mainly due to "disappointment":
I'm disappointed in myself because I don't know what to do.
They are disappointed with others, so they refuse to communicate with others.
When my daughter Qiqi was in junior high school, her grades plummeted because of her pursuit of stars.
Her homework is very heavy in the second year of junior high school. She has to do her homework for several hours every day. She often stays up late until nearly one o'clock.
At first, we didn't understand why our daughter's efficiency was so low. Later, we found out that she was hiding in her room chasing dramas and playing computer games.
I was really sad to see her fall from No.1 to No.30 in the class. At that time, I directly pulled out the computer power cord and scolded her.
Kiki was there crying and not arguing, and then we had a cold war for a while.
Ask yourself, as a parent, it is really impossible to always maintain a rational, let alone Qiqi was such an excellent child.
I was really worried that my daughter would not be able to recover, so I took her to a movie at the weekend, and found a quiet place to talk to her for a while.
I apologized for my bad attitude, saying that I could understand the teenage girl's curiosity about the world, and expressed my concern and concern about her learning.
In short, As far as possible to shorten the distance between the two people, and her heart to heart talk, also get her sincere feedback.
The moment she held me in her arms and cried, I knew that she had already understood that she must be responsible for herself.
Because of treason, how many children's mind deviated, even changed the original character.
Every parent must know how to reasonably guide their children in the face of rebellion.
Suhomlinsky, a famous educator, believes that, The essence of education is to overcome the animal instinct and develop all human nature.
Man's rebellion is the embodiment of animal nature, which refuses to be bound and tends to be free and willful.
The purpose of education is to guide and guide children to avoid contact with bad factors in human nature, so as to develop excellent nature.
Therefore, every parent is an educator, especially in the face of high school rebellious children, we should learn to guide.
Children like to play games, we should let them know how to learn by playing and feel the interest of knowledge.
Children often lazy, we should let them realize the cost of laziness, not hard work can not achieve success.
If children have bad temper, they should understand their real inner demands and help them improve their personality.
Parents can't indulge their children, and children can't always rely on their parents.
In the most critical time, forcing children can push them to a higher position and make them become better people.
[in this critical period, if parents don't force their children, it will really ruin his life! I regret watching late
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